Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Candy Negotiations


So it has been, and so it will be, until the time they are making their own decisions.

CANDY NEGOTIATIONS....

You know the "Can I have this and this?" Or "this and that?" Or "how about this BOG piece and then this sucker???"

Now whether you are a LET THEM EAT IT ALL AT ONCE kinda mom or a Lets space it out to last kinda mom ( which I am )
We have all been through the Candy Negotiations in some form or another.

I know that if I let them eat it all and get rid of it I will not have candy woes anymore. However My right Brain, or is it my left? Which ever darn side that has the reasoning part ( ***NOTE TO SELF, RESEARCH WHICH SIDE CONTROLS THE REASONING )

I just can't let them eat it all. I think WHAT IF I did they got a cavity ( because somewhere in my crazy brain I think that spacing the candy out, will prevent cavities )

Or WHAT IF they get a tummy ache. Or What If they go into diabetic shock. NO THEY ARE NOT DIABETIC. But WHAT IF they did became diabetic because I let them eat it all.

( oh man my brain is a SCARY frustrating maze of confusion and STUPIDITY... )

Can one take an actual brake from their brain?? If they can I SO NEED IT....

So I ask. What kind of mom or dad are you?

Sunday, June 27, 2010

photo's by Grasshopper

I thought today's post would be photo's, And not just any ol' photo's but ones taken by our very own Grasshopper. I hope you enjoy them,





( Note ** ) none of these photos have been altered ( I do not believe in altering children's photos. I think God made them perfect the way they are. ) except one which was altered for a funny, Not to make them look perfect.




Thursday, June 24, 2010

Out of the innocent mouth monkeys

On Fathers day we decided to go to dinner then grab some ice cream. We were on our way home from B&R when Rang was in the back talking. ( now normally he is talking about SOMETHING and I am normally half listening. ) So as rang was jabbering on and on about something I hear him say

Rang: YOU KNOW THE EVES????

Me: WHAT??

Rang: YOU KNOW THE EVES???

Me: Rang I have no clue what you are talking about.

Rang: ( by the way he was getting frustrated with me at this point ) YOU KNOW THE LITTLE THINGS YOUR MADE FROM??

At this point a light bulb goes off in my head and for some reason I know he is actually referring to ATOMS. Why my brain went to Atoms with his EVES but when he said the little things your made up of I knew he meant Atoms.

Me: You mean ATOMS honey??

Rang: NO EVES.. YOUR A GIRL SO YOUR MADE FROM EVES.

Me: CRACKING UP LAUGHING. he thought MEN where made from ATOMS and girls from EAVES

as in ADAM AND EVE.....

Only a small child could come up with that.

I love my innocent Rang Tang

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Naked & UNASHAMED

So I was chatting it up with some rather wise ladies on my BF group, and we were discussing when is the right time to stop letting your children ( if they are the opposite sex as you ) see you in all your glory so too speak.

Now I stopped letting my boys see me in my "TRUE UN-AIRBRUSHED FORM "when they hit 5-6, Not because I was thinking it was wrong or that it was perverted but well lets face it.

I scream with horror when I see my flabbiness in the mirror. I sure as heck don't need my boys having it seared into their brains... I mean can you imagine having "THAT" conversation in 15 years.

this is how the conversation would go

" So mom, "

" yes dear "

" you remember when I was a little boy?"

" Of course sweetie, You where such a good little boy."

" Yeah, Yeah, ANYWAYS....."


"well last night I was trying to get my groove on with (insert Name of future daughter in law ) and she walked out of the shower and

BAM!!!!!

their standing in her place was not my beautiful wife but rather YOU.... YEP I saw YOU..... in ALL YOUR GLORY... ( insert a big ol' EWWWWWWW!!!!!! )

now mom I am not saying your not a pretty lady, but REALLY???

NOT THE IMAGE I WAS HOPING FOR WHEN LOOKING AT MY WIFE...

I HOPE YOU KNOW I AM RUINED FOR LIFE. SCARRED,

I AM GOING TO NEED YEARS OF THERAPY....

OH AND THE WHOLE GRANDCHILDREN THING... YEP NOT GOING TO HAPPEN ANYTIME SOON....
"


So that is MY reasoning for why we nipped it in the butt ( LOTS OF PUN INTENDED ) when we did.

So when did you all make that decision????

Now if only I could convince my children that YES the bathroom does actually have a door lets try CLOSING IT WHEN ONE GOES.....Baby steps I guess

Saturday, June 19, 2010

What would you do????

so let me start off by saying this week has not been a good one. Brae and his eye,. Then I found out some upsetting news about my niece then yesterday and then last night my fur baby Koda was bit by a snake. I mean HELLO WHEN IT RAINS IT POURS....


But today is a new day and I refuse to be in a bad mood or sad. I am going to have a good day...


The sun is shining and tonight is My Brothers Keeper which is where a group of us go to the local homeless shelter and feed the homeless, It really is a wonderful service we are doing the community.


My boys LOVE to go there and interact with the men and woman.

they have met so many interesting people. In fact there are times were we will be at the library and we will run into a few of them. The boys will walk up and say


" Hello so and so, How are you? " and they remember the boys and will be so excited that these little boys will talk to them when most folks in there day to day lives look right through them as if they didn't exist.


I ask and wonder, do you do anything like this with your kids? Do your kids know that these men and woman have stories and if you take the time to get to know them you can learn so much.

Not all homeless men and woman are drunks or druggies.. most that we have encountered are just down on their luck or have medical issues that caused them to stop working that in turn caused them to lose their homes.


I challenge you to go out of your comfort zone and do something for a homeless person this coming week.


Not only will it bless them, it will bless your family so much more.
Ask yourself, Would you stop and talk to this man?

Friday, June 18, 2010

I HATE YOU!!!!!

I feel like I am LOOSING IT....

I am so highly irritated and angry and just want to SCREAM....

I hate feeling like I am loosing control over my emotions. I find that I get HIGHLY irritated at hubby for NO REASON... so then because I am irritated at him I turn around and take it out on the boys.

You know the ugly witch in The Wizard of Oz? I swear that is what I look like when I am yelling ( minus the green skin, ) I do have the crooked nose and wart though =)

But seriously WHAT THE HECK???? I know that alot of it is due in part to today's date.

Yep 2 years ago I became woman-less.

You know its funny I didn't even realize it was the 18th until I started typing this, Its strange Its like my body KNEW that it was the 18th and was lashing out because of it.

You see I suffered daily with endometriosis . I was never supposed to have kids but with the help of modern medicine and LOTS of prayers ( thank you LORD ) I was blessed with 2 boys.

But I still suffered daily with pain, SO I did what most woman that suffer with it do. I GAVE UP THE FIGHT and threw in the towel and had my womanhood ripped from me.

I can say for the first 7 months I honestly HATED hubby. I hated him for not stopping me from doing it, I hated him because no matter what HE COULD STILL HAVE KIDS... And I could not.
I know with out a doubt we will be together forever, but that thought WHAT IF lingered.

I know alot of woman have their tubes tied or have a Hysterectomy by choice and that's all fine and dandy for those that go into it choosing to do it.

But when you are someone like me that gets thrown into it with the choice of living a pain free life or suffering its just not fair.

I hate you disease, I hate that I had to make that choice, I hate that woman all over the world are struggling and suffering with infertility and pain,. I hate that there is very little research being done, I hate that I am not alone in this pain,

I HATE YOU!!!!! I HATE YOU!!!!!!!! I HATE YOU!!!!!!!

As I sit here the tears are flowing freely. I remember the pain I was in when I woke up after the surgery as if it were yesterday, I remember the smell of the room and the sound of babies crying int he distance. ( someone in their infinite wisdom thought that it was best to put a woman having a hysterectomy on the Maternity ward )

I remember knowing that I was never going to feel a life in me move again. I was never going to be Me again. I had to not become someone different.

I remember people who had NO clue what I went through on a daily basis say those 5 stupid words

" Be thankful you have 2 "

REALLY??? BE THANKFUL????? WHY????

I wanted 6 kids, I wanted to have a house full of kids, I wanted to know that I was a whole woman.

What????

I can't MOURN THE LOSS OF THE BABIES I WILL NEVER HAVE??? THE LOSS OF MY RIGHT AS A WOMAN???

Needless to say it was a TOUGH recovery, Not the physical aspect but the emotional one.

Its been 2 years I have not taken HRT's ( Hormone Replacement Therapy ) for many reason

1 I didn't like the thought of chemicals in my body FAKING the " REAL WOMAN " feeling

2-I was and still am afraid of the possibility of breast cancer

3-I am not one to remember to take a pill daily so What the heck. besides at that point I had been thrust into menopause 5 times. I managed to come out of them fine so I figured I could handle this. ( which for the most part I do. )

Now I know I get moody sometimes. OK FINE A LOT but I think I am pretty good for the most part. I do have the hot flashes DAILY and the night sweats. and I sleep like dog Dukie. ( MAYBE I DO NEED SOMETHING. ) hehehe

but all in all. I am and have lived pain free for the past 2 years.

And I pray ALOT, for without praying to the Lord I would have went postal ALONG TIME AGO...

Thursday, June 17, 2010

He is a PIRATE MATEY

So my little Rang Tang is sporting the Pirate look for a week or two, He was at a friends house playing INDIANA JONES when

****** CRACK ******

Rang was whipped IN THE EYE... and not only is this bad for apparent reasons, but Rang has had 2 eye surgeries in the past so it never fails if he is going to get hurt its in the eye.

So hubby had to go get him and take him to the Dr. where he was informed that the white part of the eye ( NO CLUE what its called and frankly TO LAZY TO RESEARCH IT. ) there I said it. I AM LAZY
is scratched and is susceptible to a infection so he needs to keep it clean and covered even while in bed.

The patch part is no biggie, its the eye drops he has to get 3 times a day. Did I mention he HATES eye drops??? I think its because he remembers the last surgery where we had to restrain him to get them in his eyes.

SIDE NOTE****

hubby strongly believes that NO one is abducted by aliens rather its them having flash back to when they were babies and adults ( that would be us parents ) were doing all sorts of craziness to them like Digging out boogies, or cleaning their behinds or when they were getting their well child check up ( can you say thermometer in the RECTUM???? ALIEN PROBE?? HUH???? sound familiar????) and the Dr's came at them with the eye flashlight thingy... I mean think about it. To them ( babies ) we probably have HUGE heads and eyes. THERE IT IS, THE MYSTERY IS SOLVED

I will say it again
THERE ARE NO ALIENS... ITS JUST YOUR PARENTS VIOLATING YOU AS A BABY WITH NOSE PICKING TEMPERATURE TAKING, BEHIND CLEANING GOOD OL FASHION PARENTING

That's what hubby believes and by golly I think he just might be on to something.

*******************Now back to our regularly schedule program********************

So poor Rang is not feeling to well and just grumpy. I will get some photos of him in the next few days and post them. But for now can you all say a little prayer for my baby??

And now you can tell your kids this story and say

" NOW WHEN I SAY NO PLAYING WITH WHIPS OR STICKS THIS IS WHY "

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

You did What WHERE???????

I know I have said it before ( more like WHINED about it ) but I REALLY am surrounded by testosterone.

Monday night the Hubs and monkeys and I take a drive down to Bryan, Which is about a hour and half from us. ( we went there looking at a tent trailer. )

so after checking out the trailer we start heading back home. We get about 10 min down the road to a DEAD STOP. ( we were on a 4 lane highway )
Oh before we left the RV place Grasshopper said he had to use the potty. ( the RV place was closed so we told him when we stopped up the road for dinner he could go )


BIG MISTAKE

so as we are sitting in the parking lot formorly known as Highway 6 Grasshopper is squriming in his seat saying

" I REALLY NEED TO GO "

so hubs hands him a cup and says HAVE AT IT

" WHAT!!!! "

Hubs says its dark and make sure you get it IN THE CUP. ( it was a Micky D's Cup ) I was like wait. Here add the paper towel to the bottom so it absorbs.

After much giggling from Rang and Grasshopper AND ME ( as I was thinking to myself I SOOOO NEED A GIRL )

I mean I would no sooner think of relieving myself in a cup as I would fly to the moon. AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN

But I guess when you have boys things like this is the Norm. ( again I grew up in a house with girls NO boys ) so things like this JUST didn't happen.

But as we were in the middle of NO where what are ya gonna do???

So after Grasshopper Rang decided HE too could not hold it.
So as he is trying, and laughing hard ( and I in my infanite wisdom just KNOW he is going to miss and get it all over the van I poiltly state

Rang stop Jacking off and just go!!! ( only to look at hubs who has completly lost it laughing at my CHOICE of words. ) thank the Lord the boys had NO clue what my slip of the tongue ment.

Needless to say we didn't get home till way late as the highway was shut down for a real long time.
But I now know that it is in fact possible to go ANYWHERE!!!

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Turtles, Toads, and PRAYING MANTIS OH MY!!!!

So the other day we were lucky enough to encounter the MARTIAN AKA Cottonwood Borer, Today we encounter so many more creatures.

It started of with Bishu my little white dog barking, and barking in the back yard, Now normally that's nothing new as he is a lap dog and barking is one of the many things he does best, ( besides licking himself silly )

So after about 20 min I go out into the yard to find out what on earth is in the woods that is causing this mass hysteria, only to come across a HUGE turtle.

Now turtles in my yard is nothing new, But this one was about 12 inches long and he was in my BACK yard. How on earth did he get into the fenced yard????

So I pick it up and carry it to the front and help him into the woods where he was headed.

After letting him go I turn to walk back into the house and there is a TOAD.. No not a little frog but a big ol size of my hand TOAD... so the boys thought this was WICKED COOL...

in their words

"FIRST A MASSIVE TURTLE NOW A TOAD.... WHAT KIND OF JUNGLE DO WE LIVE IN????"

so after "petting" the toad they came in and washed their hands thoroughly, we eat breakfast then Grasshopper decideds he is going to go "CHECK" ( which in Grasshopper language it means MESS with the turtle and toad ) and he comes running back into the house with a Praying mantis...

CAN WE KEEP IT???? CAN WE?????

Sure put him in the container you had the other Martian.... so they do, Then they decide they need to go gather food for the little guy.. and out they run with Ziploc baggies in hand to find FOOD.....

they come in after about 10 minutes and announce

I found 1 ( that was grasshopper ) and Rang found a dead one ( rang pipes up... ITS ONLY HALFWAY DEAD. )

OH THANK THE LORD... I MEAN HALF WAY IS STILL BETTER THEN ALL THE WAY..... hehehe

they grab the container and go to put their food in it for their newest pet and I hear

WHERE IS IT???

UM WHAT??? What do you mean WHERE IS IT????

its gone mom...

UM LIKE IT IS IN THE HOUSE WONDERING AROUND GONE???

YEP!!! ( I mean hello don't say YEP in a Happy tone )

I now have a freaking Praying Mantis wondering aimlessly through my house

so after I calmly regain composure I say

FIND IT NOW!!!!

after some searching they did manage to find it and Recapture it...

( this is where I breath a sigh of relief )

so after our fun filled creature morning I can safely say...

I HAVE TO MANY BOYS IN MY HOUSE.... I NEED A GIRL....

oh and this all went down before 10am... And I still have to go to work today Oy VEY

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Trying NOT to Judge But REALLY????

Ok I really try not to judge others, I mean WHO AM I TO SAY WHAT ONE SHOULD DO.... But I have to say this one topic really has gotten my prim and proper panties in a real tangle,

This whole mess with Abby Sunderland is in a word STUPID... I mean who on earth says.

"You know my 16 year old is so mature and skilled to sail, I think I am going to let her sail around the world by herself."

I mean What on Earth were they thinking???

Then the poor girl gets into trouble and there is a Manhunt for her. I am thankful that she was found safe, BUT REALLY? Now I want to know WHO pays for that search and rescue?

Now I guess I am more upset at the fact she had to be rescued. I mean What if because of the search for her someone else lost their lives for lack of the help they needed?

I just think this family was very selfish in WANTING TO BREAK A STUPID RECORD..
( yeah lets put our child's life in danger all so she can beat a record )

I mean SHE IS A MINOR... where is CPS ( or whatever you call it in your state? )
I mean this is a classic case of Child endangerment if there ever was one...

But it seems as if NOTHING was ever done to protect this child.

I read that the parents said she really wanted to do this and she was very skilled.

REALLY???

Last I check YOU ARE THE ADULT... and I don't care how skilled she is. SHE IS 16 PEOPLE... HOW SKILLED CAN A 16 year old be???

I even read that EXPERIENCED sailors told her folks that it was not a good idea, For one she was going to be in the Indian Ocean at a horrible time, And yet these "RESPONSIBLE" parents still thought it was a good idea.

All in all I think that the Parents SHOULD be held accountable for letting their 17 year old son do it last year AGAIN a minor and now her.

There should be charges brought against them and they should have to pay for ALL The time and fuel it cost to rescue her.

So I say SHAME ON THEM.....

Now I will go back to my NONE JUDGEMENTAL SELF....

Friday, June 11, 2010

The Martians have Landed

We have lived in Texas for 6 years now, And in those 6 years I have seen some pretty crazy things,

Snakes ( lots of them ), Turtles walking through the yard, Tarantulas in my home, spiders that I swear take one look at me and lick their chops, cattle that have horns that are so big I wonder how on earth they can even hold up their heads.

But I can honestly say that up until today I had not seen anything quite so beautiful, but freaky as what Rang Tang encountered in the Dog food bin this morning.

this is how it all went down

Rang Tang: WHAT THE HECK!!!!! Grasshopper come here.. OH MY GOSH!!!


Grasshopper: What NOW!!! ( walks into the garage ) HOLY COW!! WHAT IS THAT THING?????

Rang Tang: I don't know but its FREAKY...

then there was alot of running back and forth from the garage and the bedroom.

Rang Tang: YOU PICK IT UP.. I AIN"T TOUCHING IT.....

Grasshopper: Its not going to bite, MOVE... Wait hand me that shovel. ( someone thought they were tough )

then they both come running up to me...

CAN WE GIVE THIS TO DADDY FOR HIS BIRTHDAY???????

me: what, stand back I can't see. HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!!!! WHAT THE HECK IS THAT SUCKER???????

Grasshopper: ( in his best Hermione voice ) It's a Tiger Beetle. I read about them in my insect book.

Me: THAT SUCKER IS HUGE... AND WICKED COOL....

so here is a picture of the Martian that landed in our Dog food bin



After some actual research via the WORLD WIDE WEB ( I always think of Optumis Prime when I say that )

it is in fact a Cottonwood Borer... Which makes total sense since we have a ton of Cottonwoods in our yard.

so I can now add this to yet another crazy thing seen in Texas